Shadow person

New TOS - My Immediate Response

I haven't posted here in a while, and I have sad news at this point. Having read the new, abysmal, Terms of Service, I'm going to remove my posts from here and, ultimately, close down my long-standing (I've had this thing since 2004!) LJ blog, The Plainclothes Clown.

The Plainclothes Clown will, from this day forwards, be migrating to Dreamwidth. In time to come, this note will be the only blog post I will leave on here, until such day as LJ close down my account due to continued non-use.
Shadow person

Indoor Triffids

So I was with my sisters inside the house where I grew up. There were these weird roots poking through the ceiling; they were moving.

I noticed these small green plants, small succulent rosettes, emerging on the carpet and the upper floor. Smaller ones on the stairs, getting bigger and more developed the further up the stairs they got.

There were two rooms at the top of the stairs, one on either side; the doors opened, and a triffid emerged from the girls' room.

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Shadow person

Caganerwatch 2013: Why No Britney Spears?

I can get you a pic of Lady Gaga as a caganer ...


... I can get you Amy Winehouse ...



Mick Jagger ...

John Lennon ...

Michael Jackson ...

... and Elvis:-

However, I draw a blank at Britney Spears. Can't find a Britney caganer anywhere. I wonder why? It's almost as if there was somebody going around telling people to leave her alone ...


Shadow person

Etaoin Shrdlu, Everybody!

I've been thinking about the greetings people offer to one another on festive occasions - weddings, bar mitzvahs, divorces, house moves, the outbreak of war, funerals - all the happy, cheery occasions. There are just too many different festive greetings to memorise.

So I'm thinking that we need a generic, universal greeting that fits every occasion. A greeting that will always be appropriate, and will offend absolutely everybody.

And here it is.


You pronounce it "eh - TAU - een SHURE -di - LOO."

Make this an essential saying in your arsenal of festive greetings. No more "Merry Christmas," "Yuletide Blessings," "May Baal Be Satisfied By Your Offering Of Virgin's Blood," "Commiserations On Your Loss." Just utter the one-size-fits-all ETAOIN SHRDLU and that is all you'll ever need to say. Instant blessings delivered, whatever the occasion, and it automatically lets you off the hook for having to know the right thing to say to appear civil in public.


You don't have to thank me.